Stop being an emo kid, but hey! There are times that I need to let it all out too...
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My loves....
- Durianpuff
- Family
- Friends
- Blackie
- Delicacies
I am....
- Early twenties
- Capricorn
- Attached
- Fun seeker
- Food lover
- Jovial
- Optimistic
Creampuff's Mood
I want! I want!!
- Graduation in 2009
- More heels & dresses
- Family & Friends Good health
- A good pair of Ceramic flat iron
- A stable job! Income!
- Pick up Tennis course
- Road trip to hometown with parents & durianpuff in 2009
- A proper pair of couple ring ( demanding )
- More overseas trip with Durianpuff!
- Dream Wedding
Your say :
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5 comments:
Since May, since I saw that you updated this blog with a recent entry in April, I have never heard anything deep from within you.... When communication breaks down, everything breaks down. I was hoping u will secretly blog here to let me know how u felt. But now, I guess it no longer hold any meaning now since u decide to continue with that guy and forsake all the memories we had. I think it's time we deleted all our blogs...
还是放不下。。。 ：g
Its supposed to mark the second year of our ROM anniversary today....
But sadly, things didn't work out the way it should be...
I wasn't expecting this relationship to turn out this way either, had never ever wanted it like this, I had always looked forward to walk through the wedding aisle with you on 14/12/14, I had always thought how caring you would be during my pregnancy period, I had always yearned to see you waking up in the middle of the night changing diapers for our baby and you bringing our baby out for a swim and and run, bring them out on a road trip, I had always had so much thoughts about our future.... But why things had to turn out sour.... till we had to end this relationship.
Its been one month plus since we last met, during the period of time, I had been checking out on you via the social media, till the day I realised you blocked me on whatsapp, but weird, you didn't block me on Facebook? I had wanted to text you to check how are you doing.... but I always had other thoughts.... I also had the urge to text friends around you to check if you are ok.... There were times I saw your posts that you're out with other girls, it stirred some jealousy, I had mix feelings, was glad that you're moving on, but on the other hand, I was worried that you're moving on too fast and they're not being truthful to you, I was worried that you'll get hurt again.... I had so much worries for you. I was lost...
Being separated from you for a month, I do miss you, not denying that. Had flipped through our blog, reading each and every posts and comments. It was a bitter sweet relationship we had I can say.... And I had been speaking to different people, seeking for advises on our current status.... I received different responses, that makes me even more confused.
I still have my worries that I can't fix... If somebody could solve these worries of mine, I am more than willing to work this relationship out with you.
I can really foresee you change for me, treat me even much better than whoever I am with now, but... there's always a but... I am not sure about our future, I still believe that a leopard will not change its spots! You had been assuring me that your changes will become a behaviour, but, have you ever heard about such theory before? Im really stucked...
I wish we can move on asap, meet our love ones, and if we're really fated for each other, we will meet again. Jia you and take care!
I know myself whether can I change or not. What I can change or what I cannot. You know what kind of person I am. Which is why I told u, I cannot change 100% of me. I can change 50-75%. Some part of me will still remain. For you, I will show u that what u cannot do, I will do it. Cause I firmly believe that as long as I wanted it a lot, I can, and I will. I wanted to work things out a lot. I gave u so many chances. I tolerated your lie and betrayal. I gave u the time u needed till 1st Sept.
But, what did I receive? U didn't even want to try counseling. If u dun give us the chance to try, how would u know whether I can do it or not?
I wanted us to sit down and discuss and work out our differences and unhappiness so we can compromise and work with each other as how a married couple should behave when problems appear.
But u chose to take the easy way out and believe that things will not work out, without even trying.
Nobody can solve your worries except for US. Cause it's OUR relationship. I have decided on giving it one last shot back then. I really really really want to work things out back then. But u were too blinded and unable to understand how things should work.
In any and every RS, there will always be a BUT. You are letting go of a 8 year RS for someone u barely knew. Everyone said that is total stupidity. The guy who was with u for 8 years, who already knew u inside out, and still wants to forgive and work things out one more time, u don't wanna give it a chance...
I don't see hope anymore. There is nobody for me to change for now, seeing that u already have the audacity to post photo of u and him together on Facebook just add salt to my broken heart.
I can only say good luck. Just remember, Karma will strike back at you for handling things this way. I just needed a closure. I have no mood for work at all. I am even thinking of quoting and going over to Hk or China to start afresh. I totally hated Singapore now. Everywhere I go, there will be places that I have been with you. Everywhere I go, there will be traces and memories of u.
I want to forget, but I can't. It's easy for u cause u are not being alone now. U have someone to take away your attention. Try being in my shoes. Go back to your blog entry in Feb. The blog entry where U said I understood how u felt.
Cause I am very sure that for the past 5 month, u totally do not know how I felt. I tried to make it easy transition for u in feb. But u made it so terrible transition for me.
Thank you so so so so much.
Lastly, yeah. Leaped will not change its spots. But there is also another saying, 不怕天下无难事，只怕有心人。
I might not be able to remove all my spots and chance from leopard to cheetah. I will still have some spots here and there. I will still have the huge mole on my back, and the small moles on my face.
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